21 Questions For A New Relationship To Get To Know Someone Better In 2023


Building a connection with someone is exciting, whether as a friend or romantic partner. A good relationship starts with regular and curious conversations so you can get to know each other better. To get the conversation started, it can help to ask a few meaningful questions. Here are 21 questions to consider asking in 2023.

  1. What Makes You Feel Good and Why?

Our lives fill up with activities. It’s important to use our time in the best way, focusing on activities that make us feel good. Asking this question encourages self-reflection and cultivates a valuable self-awareness for the other person. This can be supported by questions such as ‘do you have any hobbies you enjoy?’ and ‘what activities do you feel you need for your overall wellbeing?’ 

  1. What is the Most Important Thing in Life To You?

By asking this question, you can gain a valuable insight into the core values, goals, and beliefs of a person. It’s a great way to understand someone’s motivations and how they’re likely to react in different circumstances. 

  1. What Is Your Greatest Achievement?

This question allows your conversation partner to light up and share a remarkable moment of their life. It can give you a better understanding of who the person is, what makes them excited and what makes them proud. 

  1. What Are You Struggling With in Life?

This is a great way to show the other person you are interested in their life and that you care. Asking this question gives them the opportunity to open up and talk about any troubles they’re currently facing. It’s a great starting point to offer them support or to recommend a qualified practitioner if needed. 

  1. What Do You Love to Talk About?

By asking this question, you can understand what topics will make the conversation flow. It’s also a great way to get to know someone by empathetic listening to them and giving them space to think and feel their sentiments. 

  1. How do you Spend Your Free Time?

We all have different ways of spending our free time. Asking this question can help you to identify somebody’s hobbies, values and lifestyle. It can also open up new conversations with potential recommendations of activities to do together. 

  1. What Do You Value When It Comes to Friendship?

Friendship is an incredibly important part of life. By asking this question you can understand what is meaningful in relationships to the other person. It can initiate a discussion around what the other person has learned from their friendships and what they need in their relationships. 

  1. What Do You Look for in a Partner?

This is a great question for a romantic relationship. It gives you the chance to talk about shared values, qualities, and interests that could establish common ground and increase the connection.

  1. What Are Your Views About If a Couple Should Spend Time Away From Each Other?

This is an ideal question to discuss early in a relationship. It can explain given boundaries and expectations they may have while also identifying whether they are family-focused or prioritise their autonomy. 

  1. What Are Your Thoughts On Making Sacrifices For A Relationship?

Relationships often require us to make sacrifices. Understanding a person’s boundaries can be very beneficial to long-term relationships. It gives you an opportunity to check whether you have compatible expectations. 

  1. What Are The Most Important Values for You in Life?

Values vary from person to person, based on place of origin, culture, and beliefs. They are what motivate our actions and shape our attitudes. This question can give you an insight into the direction and focus a person is looking for in life. 

  1. What Do You Look For In A Future Partner?

Asking this question can give you a deeper understanding of who your conversation partner is looking for in a partner. It can also reveal some interesting hidden qualities or opinions that can open up a meaningful, yet fun, conversation.

  1. What Really Annoys You?

We all deal with different levels of annoyances on a daily basis. Asking this question can show you which topics are out of the conversation partner’s comfort zone. It’s important to be mindful of it if the conversation goes deeper. 

  1. What Do You Want to Achieve Within the Next Year?

Planning for the future can be daunting for some people. Asking this question gives the other person the opportunity to reflect on their recent accomplishments and ambitions for the future year. It also reveals their most important priorities.

  1. What Is Your Opinion On Divorce?

Nowadays, many couples face the challenge of possible separation, which can be a difficult conversation to have. Asking this question offers an opportunity to discuss what it means and be on the same page regarding expectations. 

  1. What Would You Like To Know More About?

Learning is an enjoyable and rewarding activity. Asking this question can reveal what topics your conversation partner is passionate about and give you the opportunity to share knowledge. It can also bring out similarities and foster a stronger connection.

  1. What Foods Do You Really Enjoy Eating?

Food often evokes a special kind of emotion. Asking this question shows an interest in the other person’s culinary preferences and opens up the possibility of enjoying a meal together. 

  1. What Exercise Does Your Body Need?

Exercise can be hugely beneficial for both physical and mental health. Asking this questions allows you to learn what type of physical activity works for their body and can even encourage more active forms of spending time with each other.

  1. What Kind Of Experiences Do You Enjoy Doing with Others?

Group activities can be lots of fun and can make a relationship stronger. Asking this questions gives you the chance to explore what types of events your conversation partner enjoys, increasing the possibility of finding something fun to do together. 

  1. What Is Your Personal Philosophy?

Values, how we make decisions and the meaning of life — these topics can be thought-provoking. Asking about a person’s personal philosophy can reveal valuable insights about their beliefs and opinions. This can help you to get to know someone better. 

  1. What Are Your Fondest Memories?

The best way to get to know someone is often to ask them to speak about their best memories. It’s a great way to focus on positive thoughts and feelings, share stories, and create meaningful conversations.  


By learning 21 questions to consider asking someone, you can nourish a newly formed relationship. Whether you’re looking to deepen your connection with a friend, a romantic partner, or start a fresh conversation, these questions can be beneficial in setting the relationship off to a great start.


Q: What are some questions to get to know someone?

A: Some questions you can ask to get to know someone better are: What makes you feel good and why? What is the most important thing in life to you? What is your greatest achievement? What do you love to talk about? How do you spend your free time?

Q: How do I ask questions to get to know someone better?

A: To ask questions to get to know someone better, you should choose meaningful questions. Some questions to ask are: What values are important to you in life? What do you look for in a partner? What do you want to achieve within the next year? What experiences do you enjoy doing with others?

Q: What kind of topics should I avoid when getting to know someone?

A: Some topics you should avoid when getting to know someone include: criticising their lifestyle, talking about sensitive topics such as religion, or asking anything overly personal such as salary or relationship history. 

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